Meet Toby Jones’. He Offers the best barbecue and foot massage services on earth:

That’s right, Jones’ Good Ass BBQ and Foot Massage. Classic. Give him a call 708-224-6101

Apparently Toby Jones’ has a website too: www.jonesgoodassbbqandfootmassage.com

I made you a cookie… but I eated it.

Yeah. I know. You’re saying “awwwww” right about now.

Merry Christmas and Happy holidays!

Bah Humbug to those who don’t celebrate the holiday season

The largest Whole Foods Market in California opened literally just around the corner from Apple’s headquarters in Cupertino.

This is great news for CEO Steve Jobs, who is a famous health food nut of the pescetarian variety.

Here’s a little fun fact for my readers: Pescetarian is a vegetarian who will eat fish.

Source: San Jose Mercury News

“Time for Timer” was the collective title for a short series of public service announcements broadcast on Saturday mornings on the ABC television network starting in the early 1970s.

The animated spots featured Timer, an anthropomorphic block of cheese cartoon character, usually wearing a bow tie and top hat, who promoted healthy eating and personal hygiene using clever songs and animation.

The most well known segment is probably when Timer became a cowboy in “Hanker for a Hunka Cheese”.

This should bring back memories for a few of my readers:

“Time for Timer” ran concurrently and interchangeably for many years with ABC’s other educational spot Schoolhouse Rock!

They generally appeared between cartoon programs on the hour and half hour marks interspersed with regular commercials.

Yay for being a child of the 1970’s.

Ever since that trip to England, things just haven’t been the same. I mean you just can’t get any decent fish and chips around here.

No problem. Get your own inflatable Port-a-Pub. It’s constructed to an “Olde Worlde” English pub design with “superb attention to detail.”

The inflatable boasts a pan tiled roof effect, chimney pots on the exterior, an Inglenook fireplace and a stone-wall effect in the interior.

Billed as “the world’s first inflatable pub”, this pub in a box holds up to 50 guests (or 200 college students), fits in the back of a van and assembles in under an hour:

Why add an extension to your house when you can buy a portable pub that travels with you?

All pub-like features are painted directly onto the anti-fungal and flame retardant PVC walls so there’s no need to worry about unruly guests breaking paintings or windows.

You might want to watch out for guests trying to carve their names on the “wood” beams:

I’ll have a pint of Guinness and an order of fish and chips please:

All you need now is a bouncy castle attached.

Your kids birthday parties would suddenly draw quite the crowd… bouncy castle for the kids, portable pub for the adults.

If you’d like to find out more, check out the Portable Pub website.

This time of year we all like warm and tasty deserts, so I figured it was time to share my family secret recipe for apple pie and homemade crust.

As a time saver you can use a pre-made pie crust.

Also, a nice big scoop of vanilla ice cream on top of warm pie is always a welcomed addition.

Needed Ingredients For The Crust:

• 2 1/2 cups white flour
• 2 tablespoons sugar
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup cold butter, broken into small pieces
• 5 tablespoons cold vegetable shortening
• 8 tablespoons ice water

Crust Preparation:

Measure the flour, sugar and salt together. Stir to combine.

Add the chilled butter pieces and shortening to the bowl. Cut them in with a pastry cutter or knife. Don’t over mix them.

Add the ice water. Mix until the dough holds together (add a bit more water, if necessary).

Turn the dough onto a lightly floured surface, knead it together, then divide in half.

Flatten each half into a disk, wrap in saran wrap and chill for at least half an hour.

Roll out one of the disks on a lightly floured surface until you have a circle that’s about 12 inches in diameter.

Put the circle in a 9″ pie plate, trimming any extra dough from the edges with a sharp knife. Return it to the refrigerator until you are ready to make the pie.

Add filling (see below).

Roll out the second ball of dough and cover top. Use a fork or your fingers to pinch the edges together. Cut a couple slits in the top.

Needed Ingredients For Filling:

• 1/3 to 2/3 cup sugar
• 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• Pinch of salt
• 8 medium sized apples (a medium apple = about 1 cup)
• 2 tablespoons margarine

Filling Preparation:

Heat oven to 425 degrees. Peel, core and slice the apples. Try to keep the size of the slices even.

Mix sugar, flour, nutmeg, cinnamon, and salt in large bowl. Stir in apples. Pour into pastry-lined pie plate. Dot with margarine.

Cover with top crust and seal the edges. Cut slits in the top.

OPTIONAL: Cover edge with 3-inch strip of aluminum foil to prevent too much browning. Remove foil during last 15 minutes of baking.

Bake 40 to 50 minutes or until crust is brown and juice begins to bubble through slits in crust.